Story The Secret Adventures Of A Garden Dwarf

Discussion in 'Stories & Tales' started by Lina, Sep 12, 2015.

  1. Lina Chief

    garden dwarf scourge.jpg

    Garden dwarf,
    lazy one.
    Never moves,
    always prone.
    Rain or shine,
    hail or sleet.
    Standing still
    on his feet.

    Or does he...?

    Potty's garden dwarf is well-know in the village of Bramblebury. He never moves, unless a surprise storm blows him down the hill into the neighbours' gardens. And it is a good place to store brandy bottles or the odd jar of biscuits.

    He wouldn't ever move about and go on adventures, no no. Naw. Never.

    There was this one time, though, that someone swore they saw him line up for food during the GDF anniversary party...

    dwarf 01 gdf 7 warmup 05.jpg


    Mildly inspired by various vacation photo pranks involving coffee mugs or favourite dolls, I'd love to take Potty's garden dwarf on a journey through the Shire. perhaps even the lands outside! Others are surely also welcome to add their contributions *grins*

    If you use the dwarven drawing in this link, you should be able to insert it into another image and manipulate things a little with an image editor (the backgrounds around the dwarf should be transparent). Gimp is a good free image editor.
    Tibba, Primrrose, Pycella and 4 others like this.
  2. Neti Member

    Oh sounds great! I already have a couple of ideas. *grins* Unfortunately the uploaded version hasn't the transparency settings.
    Lina likes this.
  3. Lina Chief

    Try the GIF version in the link I added in the first post, that should hopefully work!
    Neti likes this.
  4. Rubysue Member

    Cute idea! I don't know what sort of TV commercials make it outside the US. but Travelocity, a low price ticket and lodging finder, has a whole series of commercials with their Roaming Gnome.

    I'll see if I can figure out how Gimp works.
    Lina likes this.
  5. Primrrose Member

    See Alvergorius Cognundrum's little book on Garden Gnomes - in particular chapter 6, "What to do with your Garden Gnome" and chapter 7, "What to do when your neighbour throws him back over the fence"
    Tibba, Rubellita, Potty and 2 others like this.
  6. Lina Chief

    dwarf 02 auction 02.jpg

    Apparently, he once visited the auction in Waymeet as well. Figures. Dwarves love going there to bid on stuffed cats!
    Tibba, Pycella, Potty and 2 others like this.
  7. Potty Member


    Dear me! I would not believe it if I would not have seen it!

    That garden dwarf does get around! Perhaps I should give him a bit less brandy!

    I bet he visits parties often too! Who knows he might play the lute too!

    It's quite amazin' how he keeps a low profile though!
    Tibba, Lina and Primrrose like this.
  8. Rubysue Member

    Oh, I don't know. This doesn't look like such a "low" profile to me. Is that... Lake Evendim down there?

    Tibba, Rubellita, Lina and 2 others like this.
  9. Primrrose Member

    The garden gnome has been heard singing a little song:

    Oh, Potty's garden is my home,
    But as you can see I'm a highland gnome,
    And in my kilt I like to roam:
    You'll not see me in trousies!

    Let the wind blow high, let the wind blow low,
    Through the Shire in my kilt I'll go,
    And the Hobbit lasses all shout: "Hello!
    Gnomie, where's your trousies?"

    There's a catch to a kilt if you are small:
    You get well tickled if the grass is tall,
    But that doesn't worry me at all,
    I will not wear the trousies!

    So you young Hobbits, wear a kilt like me,
    Walk with a strut, let your kilt swing free,
    And show all the lasses a handsome knee:
    You can't do that in trousies!
    Tibba, Rubellita, Rubysue and 3 others like this.
  10. Neti Member

    Last week, I found myself helping Bingo Boffin one more time. It was quite an adventure, since he sent me around the Old Forest. That place is so scary! I thought to be alone, but it seems I wasn't...I could feel a presence near me.
    ScreenShot00304.jpg ScreenShot00305.jpg ScreenShot00306.jpg
    Rubellita, Lully, Pycella and 5 others like this.
  11. Rubysue Member

    Okay, Potty! This thing's getting out of hand. Come get yer dwarf or G-nome, or whatever tha heck it is. That's a private dock and them fish under it are MY dinner!

    Tibba, Potty, Simbo and 3 others like this.
  12. Pycella Member

    There were many pointy hats in the Green Dragon on last Friday, but one hat caught my attention...
    Lully, Lina, Simbo and 1 other person like this.
  13. Lina Chief

    garden dwarf lobelia 2.jpg

    Bravely bold Sir Garden Dwarf
    Went forth from Potty's yard
    He was not afraid to die
    Oh, brave Sir Garden Dwarf
    He was not at all afraid
    To be killed in nasty ways
    Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Garden Dwarf

    He was not in the least bit scared
    To sneak into Bag End
    Or to spy upon the crone
    With the mean umbrella
    To risk her frowny scowl
    Or a box upon his ears
    And his silver spoons embezzled
    Brave Sir Garden Dwarf
    Potty, Lully, Rubellita and 4 others like this.
  14. Lina Chief

    turtle dwarf.jpg

    We'll save yer, Garden Dwarf!
    Lully, Rubysue, Potty and 2 others like this.

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